Monday, October 11, 2010


Last Friday, I ran across two zip lock bags that were in the back room and under a lot of stuff (at the old house). In them were cases and little boxes that you would see for rings/bracelets, etc.

I didn't have the heart to open them and see so, I took them home and put them in a corner until I could deal with those items. This afternoon, I went through them. There were high school rings, college ring, and things that Donovan probably got when he was either in high school or earlier.

Now, I know that wedding rings care a great deal of significance but, until you have to go through those kinds of things of someone that has been dead for over a year and a half, those little things take on a whole different meaning and significance. I asked G if she wanted anything of his and she said no. So, I'm putting back most of if for R and J (when they are much older).

Of course, this setting aside hurts because it just makes all that more real of what they are missing right now.

I'm not sure if it's jut me or if it's because a bunch of holidays are coming up or if it's just because it's overcast today, but it's hard to shake the blues off sometimes. So, what do you do when you feel yourself getting down? Me? I still have boxes clustered in various corners that are begging to be gone through, put up, and boxes reused for more stuff. In a large way, I am very ready to be done with having to back to the old house and just say "ENOUGH!". I also know that if I don't go through EVERYTHING, I could very well be kicking myself later for not doing so.

R, on the other hand, is starting to show signs of being stressed. Night before last, she woke up in the wee hours of the morning, asked me if it was time to get up and then crawled into bed with me (little sleep on my end since I'm not used to a kicker... Ha!) and then last night, she couldn't settle down to go to sleep so, I had to be in there with her and read my book (Pride and Prejudice to be exact) until she did (which took about 15 minutes). So, I think it's about time to go back into therapy (counseling and neurotherapy).

Gotta go get R from school. At least in that aspect, she's doing better. :)

More to follow......

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