Thursday, April 29, 2010

Something Important.

This morning, I had debated with myself of what to “talk” about. There were several things going through my head but one thought kept coming to the front so, here goes!

This is something that no one wants to talk about, think about, or face but it has to be. This is one (more like a combination) thing that blind-sided me and hit like a ton of bricks. This is something that most people my age (and especially younger) don’t want to think about because we don’t think death is going to hit us this young. Reality check!

Donovan and I had talked about getting a Will done shortly after R was born. One year faded into another and we kept talking about but never did it. When Donovan died, he left us without a will and very little information of how he managed our finances. He was the main bread-winner and I was the stay-at-home, work-from-home mom. He had the main account and I had a couple of hundered dollars for whatever we needed on short notice. Every once in a while, we would both put some extra cash in a safe box at home to save up on. Little did I know that it would be the saving that I would have to use to survive on for 5 months after his passing. He was the one that paid the bills every month. If there was anything that seemed a little off to him, he would have me call the business and find out what the charge was for so I had a rough idea of what we generally owed on some monthly bills but mostly, I didn’t. He took care of everything and I depended on him to do just that.

It’s kind of nice when companies tell you that they are sorry for your loss but, they say it with their hands out and expecting their bill to be paid on time.

Now, why am I saying all of this? Two simple yet important reasons and if you aren’t (or haven’t) done this yet, get it done or start doing it now.
1. Get a Will done and let your family know what your wishes are (legally speaking). Case in point: I had a phone call two days before Donovan’s funeral. They wanted to know if I would let them have Donovan organs donated. We had never talked about that so I had no clue what Donovan would have wanted. I had to ask K and G and they thought that he wouldn’t have wanted that. I thought it would be nice to possibly help save another life but conceded to his parent’s wishes.
2. Know where you stand financially. If you’re married, may I suggest you work together on paying the bills. If your single, at least let you family know (if they don’t already) any financial holdings that you have so that they don’t get hit blind-sided like I was.
3. Let your family know what your wishes are. This may safe a lot of headache and stress if the inevitable should happen.

I am thankful that my family and I are almost 100% debt free but it hasn’t been without some knock-downs, tears, and lots of much needed lessons. If I had known then what I do know now, maybe the journey wouldn’t have been quite so tough.

More to follow.....

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