Wednesday, July 25, 2012

The importance of words

Ever since Jeff and I have been married (back in Sept. '11), Jeff made it a point to tell R "I love you Princess" every night as part of the good-night ritual. He also tells her the same thing when it's rest/nap time in the afternoon (and yes, she still goes to sleep in the afternoons). Lately, I've noticed what kind of effect that these words have had on R. Even before Donovan died, she didn't play with Barbie's much or dress up as a Princess. She would dress up for a fancy tea party or as a fairy or something but, she didn't hear those words on a daily basis from anyone. If there is a Princess movie out (like Barbie's MANY Princess movies), she'd watch it maybe once and that would be it. Since she hears those words on a daily basis, I believe it's also raised her self esteem. She's more confident of herself. She's more open and that little spark of joy that left after Donovan passed is coming back - stronger each day and I love seeing that. Like I told Jeff a few nights ago, God KNOWS what He's doing and He knew exactly what each member of this family needed so, in His time, He provided. It's both humbling and inspiring to see and experience. Depression and grief and sap the life out of someone if they allow it to and Satan is rubbing his hands in glee when this is accomplished. Grief can leave you with a feeling of "I deserve this" or, "It's my fault my life is like this" when, in reality, life's experiences were beyond our control anyway but, we are left with feelings of guilt, depression, resentment, anger, etc.... God has a way of changing that by the people who come into our lives and help us become stronger. He has everything perfectly timed for smooth transitions that we only notice in hindsight. The thing is, we HAVE to let HIM have His way and on His time. Life can be a very challenging and scary roller coaster ride. The tie breaker is if we keep getting back up, shake the dust off, keep our faith alive, and keep trusting in Him. More to follow......


  1. Wow, Carrie. Beautiful words from a beautiful person...inside and out.