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Thursday, August 1, 2013

Rebecca's other dad...

Those words... "Rebecca's other dad" has become a new saying around our house and it's one that I'm not sure I'm ready to try and explain to a certain 4 yr old. J has seen pictures of Donovan with R lots of times. R calls him her first dad and she still has fond memories of him. The other day, J asked me if R's other dad died. I told him yes. Why? (at least this wasn't new territory for me but, it is new for Jeff to help explain) Answer: His heart stopped working. Reply: Oh. Ok. And then J goes on to play with R on something else. The first time this talk came up, I told him that Donovan was his first dad too. That only lead to confusion for J. R was 5 when Donovan died and that was difficult enough to work thru some of the questions (others haven't even been asked yet). How are we going to do this with a 4 yr old?!? In some ways, it's a blessing that J hasn't felt loss yet and isn't aware of the pain that goes with it. The only Dad that he's aware of and loves is Jeff. I know that this is just the beginning of J's travel thru knowledge and experiencing loss.... Just wish it hadn't started this soon... Oh well. As Jeff reminds me *quite often*, we'll cross that bridge when we get to it. Just so thankful that I do have Jeff by my side and we work thru things as a family. Blessed and more to follow.....