I know that I'm jumping forward from Spring Break but, this is HUGE to me.
Ever since the day Donovan died, R hasn't prayed like she used to. You know, the child like innocence of thanking God for EVERYTHING from the people in your life to the light fixtures in the room to the bed you slept on. She used to rattle off a long list of things that she was thankful for every night.... Before Donovan died on her 5th birthday. Now, she still doesn't realize the date and I pray that she won't ask about the date until she's much older and lots more mature to handle that kind of information. She has told Jeff that she loved him..... He tells her he "loves my princess" every night before bed but she just kinda hugs him back and tells him good night. Other times, she won't hesitate with the "I love you too" bit... It comes and goes in waves but she's getting there. She has come a long way tho.... Thanks to constant love from us and help from her friends at school and teachers, she doesn't stutter like she used to (only when she gets really excited or upset about something) but not every time she tries to say something. She's happy and she laughs more (thanks to Daddy for that).
For the past 3 1/2 years, she hasn't prayed on her own. She did do that once when J started wanting to give thanks before we eat but then she would politely say no if asked again. Tonight was a big on in my eyes and she used some of Jeff's words that he uses for giving thanks before meals (and then she asked what those words meant). It's like a light is slowly going off for her and she's getting her little sparkle back in her eyes.
I know that there are going to be some tough bridges to cross down the road with her (as with J). As she grows and matures and the questions may be difficult, I know that with God's help, constant love and support from us, her family, and friends, they'll both make it. One day at a time. :)
More to follow....
The above pictures were taken on Aug. 16th, 2001.... The day Donovan and I got married. The lady is Marcelline Buchanan who passed on to heaven yesterday. She was a wonderful christian lady who was a "Mom" to my dad and a "Grandmother" to me. She taught me so much and also taught me how to drive. She spoiled me as anything grandmother would (except that we weren't blood related).
When we were living in Lamesa, Tx. She was my dad's secretary and didn't know how to use the computer (she was in her late 70's I think at the time) but Dad taught her how to use the computer. She was there for my wedding to Donovan and was able to meet R less than a month after she was born. Sadly, about 5 or 6 years ago, she started down the road of Alzheimer's. During the last few years, she didn't know who anyone was. I had often debated on whether to go down and see her but, I'm glad I have these good memories instead.
In the first picture, there is also a man named Everett who was K's dad and passed on to heaven about a year ago (either this month or next). Yet another reminder of how brief life really is. Everett and Marcelline were in their late 90's but Donovan was only 35. Death does not respect people.... regardless of age. Disease doesn't either.
I am thankful that, for the first time in 3 1/2 years, I was able to look at my wedding pictures of Donovan and my wedding and not break down to uncontrollable tears. It actually felt good to show those pictures to Jeff. He was with me when I got the call from G about Everett's passing and he's here again when I got the news about Marcelline. I've been soo blessed!
More to follow.....
