This morning, Jeff and I went to R's school to talk to the speech therapist, her teacher, and the assistant principal about R's stuttering problem and the test results that the therapist found.
R has been stuttering since she was 2 or 3 and it never stopped but only got worse as she has gotten older. Most children go through a stuttering phase at around age two and then grow out of it by around age four. When this doesn't happen, the brain's neurological pathway for speech is diverted another way so that she can get her sentences out but it's delayed (hence the stuttering).
The test results for R proved that she needs speech therapy and will be getting therapy 60 minutes a week for 90 weeks (for starters). The challenge is to help her slow down (and retrain) her brain so that her speech flows like it should. She will also be talking to the school counselor (just to talk about whatever) because it's hard to tell if her attention (or lack of it) is due to emotional turmoil (still dealing with Donovan's death, changes in family dynamics, etc), or possibly ADD, or just having a frustrating time of trying to get out what she wants to say. R is having a hard time in comprehending what's being required of her and staying focused to the task at hand but, everyone agreed that the speech therapy is a must and we will see where we stand at a later date.
This was all kinda hard for me to hear. It's not easy for a parent to be told by someone that there's something wrong with your child (whatever the case may be) and (as a parent) we want to protect and shield our child as best we can from any difficulties or pain. I told Jeff that (in the back of my mind) I wondered if there was something I could have done so that R wouldn't have such a difficulty now (knowing full well that this is something out of my control). I do know that this is all in God's hands and in good hands of a school that truly cares about the educational welfare of their students. R is also a very tough little girl and she has a willingness to try her best. She enjoys going to school and she has a group of friends (and one "BFF" that lives across the street from us). Last year, she would cry on her way to school because she didn't want to go (and this was throughout the school year). She didn't want to read or do much of anything school related. This year, she enjoys telling us what she has learned that day (or the day before) and has a big grin when she goes to school in the mornings.
More to follow....
Wednesday, October 19, 2011
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
The sweater
Last night, Jeff got all of his winter cloths from storage and brought them home (since the high today is 58 degrees). He brought out three really heavy sweaters. One of them looked just like a sweater that Donovan wore when it got really cold. I couldn't say much at first because the reaction to a sweater caught me by surprise.
After we got the kids down for the night (about 30 min later), I told Jeff about the sweater and the tears came. In my mind, I could still "see" Donovan throwing snowballs at me in that sweater. Jeff's instant reaction was priceless (and one of the reasons I love him so much). He said "Guess I won't be wearing this sweater again". My reaction was that this was something that I was going to have to work through and deal with. Jeff (in essence) disagreed. Won't be seeing that sweater again.
I have moved forward with the life I've been given and so blessed to have Jeff a part of that life and thankful that he understands that Donovan has a special place. Thankful to God for the life that I have been given.
More to follow.....
After we got the kids down for the night (about 30 min later), I told Jeff about the sweater and the tears came. In my mind, I could still "see" Donovan throwing snowballs at me in that sweater. Jeff's instant reaction was priceless (and one of the reasons I love him so much). He said "Guess I won't be wearing this sweater again". My reaction was that this was something that I was going to have to work through and deal with. Jeff (in essence) disagreed. Won't be seeing that sweater again.
I have moved forward with the life I've been given and so blessed to have Jeff a part of that life and thankful that he understands that Donovan has a special place. Thankful to God for the life that I have been given.
More to follow.....
Monday, October 17, 2011
Getting adjusted
Marriage in and of itself is always an adjustment (at whatever stage you are in your life). Ours is no different. :)
For the first couple of weeks, it was a major adjustment getting used to sleeping next to someone who wasn't 7 years old and didn't kick... Which was a very nice change by the way but the downside was that Jeff had to be up at 4AM (Monday - Thursday) and work 10 hour shifts. Not only was this a bit tough for Jeff and I but it was also difficult for R and J. Both of them were still unsettled from being moved to a new house, new school, new state, etc... and then having to get used to seeing someone (other than myself) every day and confused because he wasn't always there first thing in the morning.
That all changed two weeks ago. Up to that point, we had talked and prayed about Jeff eventually going full time in working with the jail and prison ministry. Initially, we thought that Jeff could still work at Road Systems and on the weekends, we could go out and raise some more support so that he could get away from Road Systems altogether. One Sunday morning, we got a rude awaking. Jeff couldn't be up for any longer than a few minutes. His back had finally given out form all the stress and strain of using jack hammers, and other heavy equipment in restoring trailer beds for 18 wheeler trucks. The doctors orders were simple. No going back into the trailers. What's kinda funny is that Jeff had put in his two week notice the Thursday before his back went out. All I can say is God can definitely have a way of letting you know what the right course of action should be sometimes.
Now, (besides going to the MD every week and sometimes several days a week) things are much calmer. Alarm goes off at 6:30 (R is usually up by then), J wakes up (sometimes around 7, sometimes earlier) and we have breakfast. R is more settled and doesn't ask for me to stay with her before she falls asleep anymore. J is at the age of challenging where his boundaries are and has learned very quickly not to mess around with Daddy. One look from Jeff and J scrambles back to what (or where) he's supposed to be. He's also latched on to Jeff more in the last couple of days than previously. He wants Daddy to play or just to give Jeff a hug. Of course, Jeff's being home more has helped me a lot as well. It's given us more time together (not only as a couple but as a family). My hat goes off to those how are a one parent family. It's very difficult to try and raise children with just your own set of eyes, ears, and hands. It's much easier when there's two and you work as a team (and the kids know it!).
So blessed!
More to follow....
For the first couple of weeks, it was a major adjustment getting used to sleeping next to someone who wasn't 7 years old and didn't kick... Which was a very nice change by the way but the downside was that Jeff had to be up at 4AM (Monday - Thursday) and work 10 hour shifts. Not only was this a bit tough for Jeff and I but it was also difficult for R and J. Both of them were still unsettled from being moved to a new house, new school, new state, etc... and then having to get used to seeing someone (other than myself) every day and confused because he wasn't always there first thing in the morning.
That all changed two weeks ago. Up to that point, we had talked and prayed about Jeff eventually going full time in working with the jail and prison ministry. Initially, we thought that Jeff could still work at Road Systems and on the weekends, we could go out and raise some more support so that he could get away from Road Systems altogether. One Sunday morning, we got a rude awaking. Jeff couldn't be up for any longer than a few minutes. His back had finally given out form all the stress and strain of using jack hammers, and other heavy equipment in restoring trailer beds for 18 wheeler trucks. The doctors orders were simple. No going back into the trailers. What's kinda funny is that Jeff had put in his two week notice the Thursday before his back went out. All I can say is God can definitely have a way of letting you know what the right course of action should be sometimes.
Now, (besides going to the MD every week and sometimes several days a week) things are much calmer. Alarm goes off at 6:30 (R is usually up by then), J wakes up (sometimes around 7, sometimes earlier) and we have breakfast. R is more settled and doesn't ask for me to stay with her before she falls asleep anymore. J is at the age of challenging where his boundaries are and has learned very quickly not to mess around with Daddy. One look from Jeff and J scrambles back to what (or where) he's supposed to be. He's also latched on to Jeff more in the last couple of days than previously. He wants Daddy to play or just to give Jeff a hug. Of course, Jeff's being home more has helped me a lot as well. It's given us more time together (not only as a couple but as a family). My hat goes off to those how are a one parent family. It's very difficult to try and raise children with just your own set of eyes, ears, and hands. It's much easier when there's two and you work as a team (and the kids know it!).
So blessed!
More to follow....
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
The wedding!
Moving from TX to AR - expensive. Moving into a rental home - a weeks worth of very little sleep. Getting married to a wonderful Christian man - priceless!
From the day that we had decided to move the wedding up to Sept. 10th to our actual wedding day, gave me about 2 weeks to get everything done. Was I in a panic? Not a chance! Why? Because Jeff did just about everything (including setting up the tables and chairs for the meal before the ceremony). My job was to get the food coordinated, get the kids taken care of, and get whatever needed to be done, done. Simple!
Jeff's roommate decided to grill some tri tips, people signed up to be side dishes and we even got an oriental plate of meat and deserts. The whole meal in and of itself went very well. Everyone got as much food as they could handle and the gathering was small (which is exactly what Jeff and I wanted).
The ceremony itself was very special (even it it was mostly a blur) and I think it may have brought a few tears to those who were there. The reception (which is going to be on the 15th of this month) is going to be great and special as well.
I am so thankful to Jeff in everything that he does (and did) for me and for the children. There are two things that stand out on our day. One was that K and G drove up from Garland and kept the kids that night (even if they didn't get much sleep). BIG kudos's for that! Also that as soon as the preacher had introduced us as husband and wife, James ran straight to Jeff yelling "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" James may be only two but, he's a smart cookie. He understood what was going on. Especially considering that he had never had a reason to say the word Daddy up to that point.
More to follow......
From the day that we had decided to move the wedding up to Sept. 10th to our actual wedding day, gave me about 2 weeks to get everything done. Was I in a panic? Not a chance! Why? Because Jeff did just about everything (including setting up the tables and chairs for the meal before the ceremony). My job was to get the food coordinated, get the kids taken care of, and get whatever needed to be done, done. Simple!
Jeff's roommate decided to grill some tri tips, people signed up to be side dishes and we even got an oriental plate of meat and deserts. The whole meal in and of itself went very well. Everyone got as much food as they could handle and the gathering was small (which is exactly what Jeff and I wanted).
The ceremony itself was very special (even it it was mostly a blur) and I think it may have brought a few tears to those who were there. The reception (which is going to be on the 15th of this month) is going to be great and special as well.
I am so thankful to Jeff in everything that he does (and did) for me and for the children. There are two things that stand out on our day. One was that K and G drove up from Garland and kept the kids that night (even if they didn't get much sleep). BIG kudos's for that! Also that as soon as the preacher had introduced us as husband and wife, James ran straight to Jeff yelling "Daddy! Daddy! Daddy!" James may be only two but, he's a smart cookie. He understood what was going on. Especially considering that he had never had a reason to say the word Daddy up to that point.
More to follow......
Thursday, September 29, 2011
Decisions, heartache, and renewal
Every relationship has hurdles to get over and ours was no different. Initially, Jeff and I had agreed to maybe get married in October (which is now the date that our reception is *and everyone is welcome to as well*) but that all changed due to one of Jeff's "friends".
This "friend" was concerned for Jeff and he thought he was "saving" Jeff from (or even me) from rushing our relationship. The "friend" said some biting/attacking remarks to Jeff's roommate who then told Jeff. Needless to say, Jeff was furious and torn up about the whole thing. What hurt me (besides the fact that the "friend" attacked me and my family) the most was that it was tearing Jeff up and what hurt him, hurt me. You know how you don't get inbetween a momma bear and her cub. Well, anyone who messes with either one of us is bound to get retaliation from the other.
We knew we wanted a small, simple wedding and we also realized that it was getting more difficult for both of us to be apart when living in the same town (and literally down the road from each other). It was also a bit unsettling for the children because they were both asking where Jeff was every morning. So we decided to move the wedding up to Sept 10th and had a potluck dinner before the ceremony.
The "friend" was at the wedding and he tried to smooth things over with Jeff so all is well. Granted, he will talk to Jeff (or even the kids) at the church building but never say anything to me. But, that's ok. I don't have any hard feeling towards him and I know God will take care of everything in His time and in His own way. The important thing is that we are now a family and getting adjusted to that. In many ways, the "friend" helped us more than anything in that our love and appreciation for the other is even stronger than it was when we were dating. :)
I know that challenges will come up down the road but, I also know that our love and commitment to each other is strong and that our love for God and his will can get us through anything.
This "friend" was concerned for Jeff and he thought he was "saving" Jeff from (or even me) from rushing our relationship. The "friend" said some biting/attacking remarks to Jeff's roommate who then told Jeff. Needless to say, Jeff was furious and torn up about the whole thing. What hurt me (besides the fact that the "friend" attacked me and my family) the most was that it was tearing Jeff up and what hurt him, hurt me. You know how you don't get inbetween a momma bear and her cub. Well, anyone who messes with either one of us is bound to get retaliation from the other.
We knew we wanted a small, simple wedding and we also realized that it was getting more difficult for both of us to be apart when living in the same town (and literally down the road from each other). It was also a bit unsettling for the children because they were both asking where Jeff was every morning. So we decided to move the wedding up to Sept 10th and had a potluck dinner before the ceremony.
The "friend" was at the wedding and he tried to smooth things over with Jeff so all is well. Granted, he will talk to Jeff (or even the kids) at the church building but never say anything to me. But, that's ok. I don't have any hard feeling towards him and I know God will take care of everything in His time and in His own way. The important thing is that we are now a family and getting adjusted to that. In many ways, the "friend" helped us more than anything in that our love and appreciation for the other is even stronger than it was when we were dating. :)
I know that challenges will come up down the road but, I also know that our love and commitment to each other is strong and that our love for God and his will can get us through anything.
Wednesday, September 28, 2011
The move!
The last solid posting that I have on here talked about getting a house for the children and I to move into here in Searcy. Now to fill in the gaps of that move.
There is a saying that a man will do whatever it takes to be with the woman he loves and Jeff proved that in just getting us here!
We managed to find a rental house to move into (and in a college town, that is NO easy feat!). I got the kids back to Garland late on Monday Aug.1st. Had two days to load up dishes and bedding before heading back up to Searcy on the 4th. Needless to say, all the traveling was starting to take a toll on R and J (especially J who doesn't travel very well). Got to hear Jeff and First Day sing in Mountain Home (which is a two hour drive from Searcy) on the 7th and then head back to TX and start boxing everything I could on the 8th - 14th.
Jeff drove down on the 13th to help box and then load the truck up (which was the biggest we could get and we still couldn't get everything in). The 13th ended up being a very, very long day for Jeff and I and we couldn't have gotten half of everything done without the help of K and G (who took the kids) and Steve and Jackie Meadows. Jeff finally closed the door on the truck at 3:30 AM on the 14th and we took some time to go over to K and G's house, Jeff got to shower and we both got something to eat. Both of the kids were also up (they may have cat-napped for a bit) at 4AM and then we headed out of TX and to our "new" home (at least for me, R, and J).
Jeff drove the truck ahead of me and I drove my car (kids in tow) and loaded down in the back for the 6 hr drive. I'm thankful neither one of the kids were very fussy but it was very difficult for me (and I'm sure for Jeff as well). It's one thing to pull an all-nighter when you're in college. It's something completely different when you are much older. I finally had to call Jeff and ask him to pull over somewhere before I either hit a guardrail or someone else in route. Jeff found a big empty parking lot and I took a 20 min. nap in the cab of the UHaul while Jeff played with the children. After the nap, I was good to go. Jeff never rested.
We managed to get to the house late in the evening on Saturday and then the kids and I crashed (J in a pack-n-play and R and I on inflatable beds). Started unloading the truck sometime Sunday afternoon and got the beds up. Jeff has to go over to the prison every Sunday night so that the inmates can have a service and Bible study (which is open to everyone) and then have to turn around and get up at 4AM to to go work (for 10 hours) on Monday. Needless to say, we had the truck all week because of time constraints on Jeff and my lack of ability to lift heavy boxes but, we finally got the truck turned in and (thanks to a good friend) the trailer for Jeff's car turned in much earlier.
I am soo thankful for Jeff's willingness to do whatever it took to get us to our new home (and everything he continues to do even now for the betterment of the family).
More to follow.....
There is a saying that a man will do whatever it takes to be with the woman he loves and Jeff proved that in just getting us here!
We managed to find a rental house to move into (and in a college town, that is NO easy feat!). I got the kids back to Garland late on Monday Aug.1st. Had two days to load up dishes and bedding before heading back up to Searcy on the 4th. Needless to say, all the traveling was starting to take a toll on R and J (especially J who doesn't travel very well). Got to hear Jeff and First Day sing in Mountain Home (which is a two hour drive from Searcy) on the 7th and then head back to TX and start boxing everything I could on the 8th - 14th.
Jeff drove down on the 13th to help box and then load the truck up (which was the biggest we could get and we still couldn't get everything in). The 13th ended up being a very, very long day for Jeff and I and we couldn't have gotten half of everything done without the help of K and G (who took the kids) and Steve and Jackie Meadows. Jeff finally closed the door on the truck at 3:30 AM on the 14th and we took some time to go over to K and G's house, Jeff got to shower and we both got something to eat. Both of the kids were also up (they may have cat-napped for a bit) at 4AM and then we headed out of TX and to our "new" home (at least for me, R, and J).
Jeff drove the truck ahead of me and I drove my car (kids in tow) and loaded down in the back for the 6 hr drive. I'm thankful neither one of the kids were very fussy but it was very difficult for me (and I'm sure for Jeff as well). It's one thing to pull an all-nighter when you're in college. It's something completely different when you are much older. I finally had to call Jeff and ask him to pull over somewhere before I either hit a guardrail or someone else in route. Jeff found a big empty parking lot and I took a 20 min. nap in the cab of the UHaul while Jeff played with the children. After the nap, I was good to go. Jeff never rested.
We managed to get to the house late in the evening on Saturday and then the kids and I crashed (J in a pack-n-play and R and I on inflatable beds). Started unloading the truck sometime Sunday afternoon and got the beds up. Jeff has to go over to the prison every Sunday night so that the inmates can have a service and Bible study (which is open to everyone) and then have to turn around and get up at 4AM to to go work (for 10 hours) on Monday. Needless to say, we had the truck all week because of time constraints on Jeff and my lack of ability to lift heavy boxes but, we finally got the truck turned in and (thanks to a good friend) the trailer for Jeff's car turned in much earlier.
I am soo thankful for Jeff's willingness to do whatever it took to get us to our new home (and everything he continues to do even now for the betterment of the family).
More to follow.....
Tuesday, September 27, 2011
Getting caught up (again).
Greetings from the land of AR! I haven't been in front of a computer for almost 2 months (and yes I'm still breathing) but, A LOT has happened since then.
I've had a lot of event's, turmoil, and thoughts going through my head and about to go nuts if I didn't get it all down somehow so, please bear with me over the next couple of days as I slowly get all of this stuff out.
For the moment, I am one tired momma. J was up TWICE last night so sleep has become mandatory (and for those of you that are parents, you know EXACTLY what I'm talking about). Until then, prayers are that everyone has a great rest of your night.
More to follow....
I've had a lot of event's, turmoil, and thoughts going through my head and about to go nuts if I didn't get it all down somehow so, please bear with me over the next couple of days as I slowly get all of this stuff out.
For the moment, I am one tired momma. J was up TWICE last night so sleep has become mandatory (and for those of you that are parents, you know EXACTLY what I'm talking about). Until then, prayers are that everyone has a great rest of your night.
More to follow....
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